18 Apr 2008

" It's time to relax, now you've worked your arse off
But the only one smilin' is the sun tanned boss

Work and work and work and work till you die
There's plenty more fish in the sea to fry"
I'm now at that stage in my life where I see kid's fashion and think "That just looks shit." The ones that really make me laugh are the 'emo' kids, whatever the hell an 'emo' is I dunno and more to the point I don't care, but I digress. They have all the dress sense of a Japanese housewife crossed with a manga character and a slightly gay goth in a sort of bizarre Jeff Goldblum in 'The Fly' transporter accident. Some of them are truly bizarre, like they were halfway through a haircut suddenly remembered a life or death appointment and crashed the car into a jumble sale on the way home. Other people that piss me off are the ones that have the waistband of their trousers under the bumcakes. Get a fucking belt people. I don't want to see a crack of some blokes arse when I turn a corner in my shop just because you want to see something on the bottom shelf, we have somewhere to park our bikes. I keep wanting to go up to them and hoist their trousers up and say in a stern manner "You dress properly young man or I shall have words with your mother" Whilst wagging my finger at them. There was a girl the other day looking at the batteries with about six inches of bum crack showing, I nearly played 'arse cake darts' with my pen but thought better of it. And to think that 100 years ago you were considered a slut if you showed too much ankle. I used to despise the 'chavs' around the area, what with their pastel coloured baseball caps perched on the back of their heads, with the hem of the tracksuit tucked into the white sports socks but now I just laugh at them with their ugly dogs, also the animals they hang around with. Mind you I suppose some thought has gone into the outfit as it's ideal for the purpose it was designed for, running away from the police/shop security. I get to carry the security radio around with me all day at work (joy) and it can get quite exciting at times, just like some radio drama. If it's not chavs it's big issue sellers being watched and followed all day. Bournemouth for some unknown reason seems to be inundated with Big Issue vendors at the moment. None of them have seen soap for a while, which beggars the question why try to convince me that you are trying to decide whether to purchase the portable dvd player for £100 or not? Personally I follow them around like a cleaner version of their own shadow until they take the hint and fuck off. I mean if you have £100 to spare, (which I doubt), Then try walking down the hill to superdrug spend £20 on soap and such and use the other £80 on maybe the first step in sorting your life out? Just a thought (a surprisingly right wing thought... for me anyway). Instead you waste my time in making me follow you around so that I can't serve other customers you know the ones that had a bath this side of oooh let's be generous and say Christmas. I'm certain that if they had been around Hitler would have added Big Issue sellers to his 'Shit list'....Hmmmm there is an empty shop across the road from us. I wonder if the Prince Of Wales Trust would give me a grant in setting up a gas chamber? Maybe not but I'm pretty certain the Duke of Edinburgh would fork out from his own pocket.

Anyway enough middle aged (sigh) rantings here's the music. Firstly I've upped a shedload of my latest vinyl rips (list in comments) and I've posted a couple of great albums firstly Legalize It by Peter Tosh and David Bowie's Heroes.


P.S. So
rry for the lengthy delay.... I now have a PS3. With you've guessed it Star Wars Lego on it....well it does have extra levels and characters... and a PSP with Medal Of Honor Heroes 2 on it so I'm pretty muched fuck as far as social contact goes.

8 Apr 2008

"There`s been a brainwave at the radio station
Old idea from the woodstock generation
Calling all the kids from across the nation
In some it brings out love in others termination"
My current gaming cv consists of my having completed every Medal of Honor in the series apart from Airborne and that only being because I haven't got a 360 yet. I've just blown many a pixelated nazi away in Vanguard including the last level which was so hectic I don't honestly believe I wasn't breathing for at least three minutes. I'm currently engaged in battle upon my psp at work which mainly results in swearing and cheese toasty fingerprints all over the controls, but what the hell? It's what stealing the alcohol swabs from work is all about. Mind you when we come to want to remove the security tags from the products the swabs seem to inadvertantly disappeared.
When not shooting sprite based nazis I'm to be found in a lego galaxy far, far away... I have now finished Lego Star Wars 2 on PSP (Surely the greatest thing to hold in your hands since the invention of breasts?)... , PS2 and PC... because I'm sad. I did try to get it on my mobile phone but it's so old that it would probably result in it breaking like and elderly man having a stroke on a hot day. Anyway I forget why I started this particular post as I sit here resplendent in my Lego Star Wars "I Am The Master" t shirt & supping PG Tea from my clone trooper mug. I found myself all 'a tingle' in a sad fan boy stylee for the new star wars clone wars CGI series coming up. Basically it's going to be Episode 2.5. It's looking good if the trailer on Star Wars.com is anything to go by... I wonder if this is the reason my equally star wars fanatical fan boy nephew, Ryan, froze his mother's computer recently? Anyway I'm hoping that it'll show why Anakin decided to go over to the darkside more than he just had a bad dream and a tizzy with Obi Wan? I mean it's a wonder, if that's the reason, why I never went over to the darkside after Wilkinsons'? Or did I? I do dress in black a lot and wish I had the ability to crush people's throats with a gesture of my hand... I'm hoping that there will be a gory scene of the massacre of Jar Jar Binks' people (The Gungans) hinted at in the Clone Wars comics, we can only hope. (See? Dark Side!!!)
It's my birthday on the 17th so I'm hoping that life begins at thirty nine and not forty like the expression says as I'm getting bored with waiting. God... 39 now that's depressing. Right I'm off before I get into a fugg I can't get out of.

Here's the music Big Audio Dynamite albums, This Is B.A.D, No. 10 Upping St. and Megatop Phoenix. There'll be some more vinyl by my next post for the fans of that kind of thing.

Upping 1
Upping 2
This Is