24 Apr 2007

"Is it wrong to be alone,
An adventure of my own,
A celebration of myself and me,
Discovering what i can be,
The half a couple fantasy."

Me today in the weeds

Today I'm covered in scratches and my arms and legs really ache. I've been trimming the garden with extreme prejudice. The plants it had to be said were putting up a fight and kept biting me. Considering the garden hasn't been touched since Tony Blair was popular I'm pretty chuffed with the results so far. Well it made a change from sitting in front of the computer and playing Blitzkrieg or Star Wars:Empire At War , er .. I mean job hunting. It was so overgrown out there I kept expecting a man in a pith helmet to come out of the undergrowth saying "Dr .Livingstone I presume?" Or maybe the Fukawi tribe of pygmies (they are the ones who keep jumping up in the tall grass saying "where the fuck are we?" Mind you the new neighbour is quite attractive and the cats are all very willing to be scritched on the head by me (Lord of the puddytats). Mind you she wouldn't be interested in me as she has a pulse. Anyway I'm off to Bournemouth tomorrow and possibly Poole on friday in the search for more vinyl delights. I like the hot weather as it is 'peanut smuggling season' again my favourite season. Although one day I'll be involved in the harvest too.

Now I'm no king of cool by any stretch of the imagination (although my sisters children think I'm cool, but this may be to do with the constant stream of presents winging their way up to Norfolk). But trying to look cool by blasting out the music whilst stuck in traffic and sitting in a Renault Espace just doesn't work no matter how hard you try. Someone should have told those two kids the other day. It reminded me of the time my mate Simon bought a boom box for the asthmatic white Ford Fiesta 1.1L he was driving. It was only just small enough to go in the boot, anyone who was sat in the back would have had their innards liquified at full volume. I used to have the bridge of my nose pinched between my thumb and forefinger as I tried to send out "I'm not really with him" psychic messages to any girls that Simon tried to impress at road junctions and traffic lights. Not only would that not work for the reason that I've always thought that Simon resembled Gene Wilder if he ever wore a donkey jacket but also for the fact that enormously enhanced bass beats don't quite have the same effect when they are from Marillion rather than rave music.

Anyway enough inanities (for the time being). Tonight's music is Madness 7 as per the request. Personally I think It's one of the 20 greatest Madness albums of all time. Also we've got The Beatles - 1 as I'm going through a Beatles period at the moment. Sound of the suburbs from some of the finest New wave bands of the late seventies/early eighties although I've no idea what Martha & The Muffins is doing on there. Anyway I'll say goodnight because I'm tired and have chlorophyll in my ears.

http://rs108tl.rapidshare.com/files/29159137/M7.rar Madness 7

http://rs83cg2.rapidshare.com/files/29164316/B1.part1.rar Beatles 1


http://rs80gc.rapidshare.com/files/29169729/TSotS.rar Sound of the suburbs

21 Apr 2007

"The ministry of co-operation
Are washed and hanging on the line
There's a million burning questions
To set the Thames alight
Now I've joined an exclusive club
Just by being more than poor
I saw the deputy chairman, on the floor".

Tonight my legs hurt. I've been a wandering over the concrete hills and tarmac dales of central Bournemouth in search of the vinyl delights soon to be posted. It used to be so that you could go into any charity shop and pick up an armful of fantastic plastic for next to nothing and be happy with it. Nowadays it's near nigh impossible, unless you're into military music, classical, Rosemary Clooney, Jim Reeves, James Last or some such, but I'm not in rest home so none of those appeal. I blame ebay. No longer will I be able to pick up armfuls of ska and two tone stuff for 10p a throw. I built up a collection of 500 7"s alone doing that, but sadly had to sell it because I like to eat/live indoors/keep my legs intact. Not to mention nearly every third generation Ska lp on Staccatto, Skank, Dojo and all those other 90's labels. 99% of the Two Tone Label and every Madness item except for the grey day cassingle. Still what's passed is past.

Something else that came to my attention as I wandered lonely as a clot today was the fact my past is disappearing at a rate of knots. A few years ago now I returned to my native village in deepest darkest Norfolk (the court order had expired) and found they had built a new estate on each of the bits of scrubland where we had our hide outs as kids and one on the old derelict RAF base where we shot all the windows out with modified air pistols. Today I find that another of my old bars that we used to frequent with the band has disappeared. Many a night was spent being drunk watching some half arsed ska band pluck away at some old classics, although I spent several nights there watching bands other than Bigshot too. 999, UK Subs to name but the ones I can remember. Many local groups too, I wonder whatever happened to Pronghorn? How that girl with the large lady bumps managed not to catch her knockers in the accordion I'll never know (although I was always ready with the first aid kit. Still nothing lasts forever I suppose?

My horriblescopes for the week says "destiny awaits in a newsagents" I hope it's not the one at the top of the road, I don't fancy a 50 year old asian man.

Well here's the music for tonight we have a repost of all the 12"/80's series a repost of the Stiff rarities. Finally I've uploaded another of my charity shop finds Labour of Love by UB40 the promo film they made to go with the album. The sound has a bit of flutter here and there but you hardly notice and I'll try to find a better copy in my travels.

http://sharebee.com/d2ac40a0 12"/80's/1




http://www.sendspace.com/file/ie3b4o 12"/80's/2




http://rapidshare.com/files/28407519/D.part1.rar 12"/80's/Dance




http://rs118tl.rapidshare.com/files/28052561/P.part1.rar 12"/80's/Pop




http://www.sendspace.com/file/w1pc38 UB40 labour Of Love movie






http://www.sendspace.com/file/m0qrqq Stiff rarities raiding the vaul



19 Apr 2007

"Don't ask us to attend,
'cos we're not all there,
oh don't pretend 'cos i don't care
I don't belive illusions 'cos too much is real
so stop you'r cheap comment
'cos we know what we feel."

Only a couple of months until the Simpsons movie. I can't wait, I might even go down the cinema to see it instead of downloading a screener where the audience members walk across the picture or like that copy of Clerks 2 where the bloke was eating his popcorn loudly. Speaking of the Simpsons my new game de jour is 'The Simpsons Hit & Run' on the Gamecube. I find it highly amusing and sometimes very annoying especially when it's against the clock as I get lost and the clock runs out although, I did do a handbrake turn and sideswipe Chief Wiggum which isn't bad for and eight year old girl really (Lisa was driving the stolen sports car). Mind you all this will come to and end when I find a job. So I'll enjoy myself while I can. I'm enjoying the sunshine a great deal at the moment and it seems to be helping my mood too after a really shitty winter for varied reasons. I had a great birthday and lots of presents (unlike christmas where everyone ignored my present lists, why ask for them if you are going to ignore them?) I got quite a bit to keep me busy and my sister's parcel finally arrived from deepest darkest Norfolk on Thursday (two days after my birthday) and it contained my easter egg too (so that's breakfast sorted). I got another of my favourite movies, 'Funeral in Berlin' (hence the scrolling dialogue at the top of the page), A Stiff records rarities compilation and 12"/80's/Pop both of which I 'll share with you of course. I'm nice like that. Sadly I can't upload an easter egg though. I was disappointed to yet again not have my friend(s) get me a cake with a lady jumping out of it with her thru'penny bits out, but there you go. Mind you after the incident the other year with the topless woman in the cake... I told them to bake it first then put the woman in but no....

Oooh I also got some Sergeant Bilko dvds which I was chuffed with so it hasn't been a bad couple of days. No sign of the black dog (although there is a new cat in the garden). I bought a fanzine (I know, how old hat?) by an old friend the other day god I hope I'm not that boring and one dimensional with this blog? I think it's a shame when people don't grow and develop as they age I like to think I have otherwise what's the point? I think I wouldn't like to meet myself from an earlier era either (that was a lot easier to type than it was to say). I'd probably think I was a complete twat... mind you I think that about modern me too so what's the difference?

Anyway here's the music for you. The two cd's I got for my birthday mentioned above and an old cassette from Ian Dury & The Music Students which I've never seen on cd anywhere, but I've converted it from tape by sticking it on a piece of wood and banging a few nails in.

http://www.sendspace.com/file/52wscn Ian Dury & The Music Students 4,000 Weeks Holiday

New Links Imminent 12"/80's/Pop

http://sharebee.com/29ffaf81 Stiff Rarities Vol 1 (new links 26 04 07)


15 Apr 2007

"Barclays iron eagle, "33 injection" Sold to advertiser,
computer execution line They give then take away,
repossess and crucify
The more you own the more you are,
lonelier with cheap desire"

Now I've not met whoever is my bank manager but I'm pretty certain that by his/her behaviour recently that they are twelve years old. Or just retarded to the point where they think that stamping their feet and taking their toys home constitutes being helpful. Recently I had the bright idea of contacting a company that had an advert in an article on AOL re hideously large bank charges. You may remember me moaning about them on several occassions? Well no sooner had I done that and the company contacted my bank for the six years worth of statements they needed from my bank then the wonderful Abbey Nazi-onal decided that ooooh "they wanted their overdraft back and you can't all play with it so there and I'm telling my mum you swore" etc etc. So now I have to find several hundred pounds by magically sticking my hand up my arse and producing it like a magician's rabbit. "Why would this be a problem?" I hear you ask "after all you are gainfully employed" you continued .... "weeeeel about that" I reply sheepishly.I got fed up of living electrical due to the fact that I went for a job interview and was under the impression that I would be customer facing and not lifting heavy old crap. But was I wrong? I turn up for work and I'm shoved in the warehouse lifting heavy crap. Which does my old back injury no good whatsoever at all. I was promised at the interview that I wouldn't be doing sundays and there they are down in the rota ...several sundays. I was told that I would do two early finishes and two lates but all I did were late finishes and this meant getting home two hours after finishing work, having run the gaunlet of the homeless accosting me for money which I don't have. Too late to eat so I wasgetting one meal a day and I lost a stone in a week and a bit. On top of which the bloody tannoy only played 6 songs all day interspersed with Comet ads, now I like Edith Bowman's voice and she is quite attractive I just don't want to hear it 8 hours a day. I don't think they were too impressed by my having several days off ill in my first fortnight but there you go. Ironically the only person I got on with there was the security guard. Still I'm optimistic that employment that I like is just around the corner. I'm going to do it my way again as I don't relish spending the next three months doing it the Job centre's way and finding nothing. Besides which I've finished both Lego Star Wars games so I'll have to find something. Birthday on tuesday which is the day I find out if they'll give me income suport or throw me in the Dickensian poorhouse.
Anyway as a way of an apology for the Madness tribute cassette I posted the other day here's the genuine article themselves. It's an American compilation so it has he US version of It Must Be Love which I prefer less than the UK version because of the missing sax solo. But there you go. Also I've reupped some of my previous posts to RS.com as per the request. They are Lucky 7 - Skatalites, Don Drummond '67 - '72 and Various Trojan 'And This Is A Ska Explosion'. I'm currently trying to convert some old tapes to mp3 so whatch out for some old gems in the near future including a rare Ian Dury tape which I have never seen on cd.

http://rs109cg2.rapidshare.com/files/26221135/V_A_-_ATIASE.rar And This Is A Ska Explosion


http://rs117gc.rapidshare.com/files/26272477/TS_-_LS.part1.rar Skatlites Lucky Seven


http://www.sendspace.com/file/yz1t3z Madness - Ultimate Collection

11 Apr 2007

"To keeping silence I resigned My friends would think I was a nut Turning water into wine Open doors would soon be shut So I went from day to day Tho' my life was in a rut 'Till I thought of what I'd say Which connection I should cut"

Well that wasn't a very fun Easter weekend let me tell you. I came home from my wonderful job which I love (read in sarcastic tones). I got home and felt really rough no sooner had I got me coat off and relaxed when, whoever's in charge of these things, decided that was the right time for me to be ill for the first time in years. In fact the last time I remember being ill was when I was on nights with a certain reader and he had the windows open all night (ahem) mentioning no Jimmy's, but that was just a cold and I still struggled on with putting out the cheap crap we sold. This though was high temparatures, headaches and vomiting. I spent the weekend mostly in bed, dragging myself heroically across the room (heroically I tell you), to do the next upload for my avid readers (both of them), not that I like to mention it you understand? But it really was a mammoth effort more in fact than you realise especially if you saw my great fat hairy arse stumbling across the room, most mammothesque, well a small mammoth really. I've ruined the environment by having my fire up at the highest setting and still shivering under my 18 tog duvet and fleece blanket (see? Heroic). I've had the wierdest dreams too the one I remember most was the one where I had to reknit the fabric of reality Lego brick by Lego brick, that was freaky. Still I don't think my 'wonderful' new manager believed me on the phone, I expect that she thinks I went out on the piss with my friends, well a, I don't have that many friends anymore (they never seem to email anymore) and b, I'm teetotal since 26th July 1994 (and fuck has it been boring or what?), not that I gave up the drink because of alklylosism, if anything I'm a Lucozadeholic if this weekend is anything to go by (6 litres) (see? Heroic). At least I got to redress the evironmental impact of my gas fire being responsible for the death of at least two penguins or a small polar bear by recycling the bottles.

Anyway here's some music (which is what you really came here for, not my inanities). Firstly I've converted a tape that I bought in 1982 and never listened to again. Why? Well remember when Woolworth's used to do those 'Tribute to...' tapes with the red cassette boxes? I bought the Madness one as I was an avid fan and me and my mates (mainly Simon and Gavin) used to ride around the village with a tape recorder taped to the front of one of the bikes or other playing two tone or our own bootlegs what we had taped from the radio or a compilation we'd made. This was the only time we all agreed on a tape, we came to the conclusion that you will undoubtedly reach. It's what is technically known in the music industry as "Stock, Aitken & Waterman" or absolutely fucking awful to us laymen. It's worth a download just to see how many lyrics they get wrong. Also there's a couple of bootlegs from the Jam 100 club from 1977 and mod mod mod mod world from 1982 and I've put up Cosmic Thing by the B52's.

http://www.sendspace.com/file/gsic5e The Jam Mod Mod Mod World (82)

http://www.sendspace.com/file/5mc7ou Insane Terrain (Madness Tribute)

http://www.sendspace.com/file/z7jl8t The Jam 100 Club (77)

http://www.sendspace.com/file/x9n0qk B52's - Cosmic Thing

5 Apr 2007

"There was a time, the laughing time
I took my heart to every party
They'd point my way "How are you today?"
"Will you make us laugh? Chase our blues away?"
Their funny man won't let them down
No, he'd dance and prance and be their clown
That time, the laughing time
When even a fool learns to love"

(pic) My bank manager meets his friends for lunch.

Firstly I'd like to state that if there are any of my readers out there that are in the throes of education then please heed this advice. Don't fuck it up do all your exams, stop hanging around the park after dark, put down the Alchopops and study. That way you won't be like me stuck in boring dead end jobs under people are less intelligent than yourself but seem to float around the place on a cloud of smugness when quite frankly they are fuckwits with expensive aftershave on. Some of the managers at my new job are just totally sanctimonious wankers who seem to thrive on there own self belief just because they can talk pople into extortionate credit deals to buy a bigger telly/fridge/cooker etc than they actually need. Maybe I'm too honest but I always say buy the best you can afford, it's the only advice that I can remember listening to and sticking too and it works. I mean do you really need an extention lead that would cost £159.00 just make the tv that little bit clearer?
Anyway I've got a new job (which I fucking hate hence all the 'unusual' sweariness) working for Comet " We live electrical". Yeah? you fucking live it mate I'm the fucker who has to tote that barge lift that American style (huge) fridge freezer. Plus they won't allow a union, fascist mo' fo's, I'm staying in the union and they can sack me for all I care. It's the right of every man, woman, dog and child over the age of 16 to be in a union if they wish, by law. So in defiance/sheer bloody mindedness I found my old GMB union pin badge and stuck it on my coat for all to see. (Neb if you are reading this I want one the size of a dinner plate please... or a t-shirt). I'm in the mood to pull out my old Billy Bragg stuff again. Still at least no one's spent six months setting me up for a childish practical joke yet like the other place... Yet. Oh and customers if you want to buy a 50" plasma tv then please come with a car that's not able to fit a 42" it's so much fun having to lug those fuckers around I can tell you, I can't get enough of it please do more stupid shit like that.
Still I may fuck of to the Bahamas or Brownsea Island depending on how much I get refunded from the banks in illegally charged fees. Apparently if you were charge £20 six years ago they could claim it back for £120. Also you are only eligible if you were charged £1,000 in six years hmmmm let me think... try "The Abbey Nazi-onal muthas took a thousand and more off me in ONE year." I should have been debt free two years ago but thanks to charges placed... Mind you I need to think if I'd want to come back to 'Dear Old Blighty' if I left? Quite frankly I could sit somewhere on a beach and just wake up when it's time for some beautiful foriegn woman to fuck me brains out. I think I need a rest, a soul recharge or just a bullet in the brain?

Anyway here's the music David Bowie singles collection. Haircut One Hundred - Pelican West and an audiobook of Len Deighton's - The Ipcress File. Also I thought I'd upload The Cult's 'Electric Cult' video from waaay back in the day which I've just recombobulated to avi from VHS. Plus as a bonus for being so long in the making this time I've added The Mock Turtles - Turtle Soup too. BTW If usually you recieve an update email from me and didn't this time it's because I've culled my address book of those who don't reply to emails. I can take a hint. Enjoy the music.

http://www.sendspace.com/file/bvshmh Bowie


http://www.sendspace.com/file/tz7l5l Haircut 100

http://www.sendspace.com/file/vr2tfr The Ipcress File


http://www.sendspace.com/file/xx4amt The Cult





http://www.sendspace.com/file/e9sinv The Mock Turtles